Unkosher Jesus- Red Meat Commentary With a Side of Cheese: Pope Makes Totally Gay Analogy Between Gays, Trees

Oh. My. GOD! Pope Benedict XVI, did you really say this today? With a straight (Ha ha, get it? Straight!) face??

The Church should also protect man from the destruction of himself. A sort of ecology of man is needed. The tropical forests do deserve our protection. But man, as a creature, does not deserve any less.

Um, uh, where to start, where to start?... Is the pope implying that homosexuals are being harvested so that there is more and more land available to grow soy beans which are then processed and fed to the birds that eventually become McDonald's Chicken McNuggets? Or that homosexuals, like lush rain forest fauna, help regulate CO2 emissions and serve as a buffer against global warming?

Or, has the pope actually, simply lost his mind? I pose this question in light of his comments today, as well as in the broader context of Catholic Church priorities that have been brought to the fore under his papacy, including...

...to name a few.

The pope went on to say that we need to "listen to the language of creation" to understand the intended roles of man and woman. Apparently, the Church views the intended roles of man and woman is to be available to have sex with each other and make little Catholic babies, the little ones without whom there is no other conceivable (ha ha, get it? Conceivable!) reason to have sex, The End.

Oh, Lord, this is just embarrassing. Honestly, the science exists demonstrating that whatever the cause of any person's homosexual orientation may be, it is a natural state of being and is not an elective choice. Jesus himself says nothing- NOTHING- about the subject of homosexuality anywhere in any of the four canonical gospels. Maybe the pope and his Church need to stop and listen more carefully to what Nature is saying about the intended roles of man and woman. If he clears his mind of all of his preconceived notions about what homosexuality is, he might hear Nature calling all people to live in peace, to support equality and justice, and to make room for the wide range of human possibilities that Nature Herself provides for. As such, he might also hear the voices of homosexual members of his own Church, voices that are as filled with the pain caused by the Church's position on homosexuality as with the hope for inclusion as full members of the Church just as they are, just as God made them. Stop this preoccupation with sex and sexual orientation, put an end to the need for special ministries for homosexual Church members, and minister to them as people who have the same spiritual needs as all other people and allow them to enjoy equal standing as Church members among their straight brothers and sisters.

Gay Catholic Youth Forum, Clip 1 of 10 (World Youth Day 2008, Sydney, Australia)