Unkosher Jesus- Red Meat Commentary With a Side of Cheese: What, me worry about you?

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong. Can you guess which one?

Quote #1: He summoned the crowd with his disciples and said to them, "Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and that of the gospel will save it. What profit is there for one to gain the whole world and forfeit his life? (The Gospel According to Mark, Ch. 8, v. 34-37 )
Quote #2: "The first question which the priest and the Levite asked was: 'If I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?' But... the good Samaritan reversed the question: 'If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?'" (Dr.Martin Luther King, Jr.)
Quote #3: "...but this being now decided by the voice of the nation, announced according to the rules of the Constitution, all will, of course, arrange themselves under the will of the law, and unite in common efforts for the common good (emphasis added)." (Thomas Jefferson's First Inaugural Address, March 4, 1801)
Quote #4: "There is a belief now that individuals, especially young people, should essentially ... 'devote themselves' to something greater than themselves -- sacrifice their own wants, their own interests, to serve the common good, whatever they happen to believe it is at the time. To me, that's very un-American. I just don't think it's the role of the government to have me tutoring young kids if I don't want to or digging latrines if I don't want to or cleaning up trash at housing projects. People who serve in the military do so voluntarily, and I think they do so out of their own self-interest. They do so because they want to attack and kill a militant Islam [sic]. They do it very selfishly." (Jonathan Hoenig, Fox "News" Commentator and Managing Partner of Capitalistpig Asset Management LLC.)

So, did you guess which quote stands out like the proverbial turd in the punchbowl? If you guessed Quote #4, you are one smart reader! I presume that you've heard of Jesus Christ, Dr. Martin Luther King and Thomas Jefferson. But Jonathan Hoenig? If you're scratching your head trying to figure out who this guy is, you're likely not alone (unless you're in a room full of people who only watch Fox, in which case Unkosher Jesus will pray for you). The best I can figure is, if Ben Stiller ever procreated with Alfred E. Newman, and then they gave their love child a lobotomy, the result would basically be Jonathan Hoenig.

Separated at birth?

It is the stock in trade of the Fox Network to go beyond the pale on any number of issues and topics. Nothing is sacred at Fox except for crisp dollar bills and the opinions of any of the braying jackasses it employs to squawk at the teevee camera. I do feel, though, that in denigrating the notion of the common good, of a nation whose citizens work together for shared prosperity and security, Fox has literally out-Foxed itself in debasing an ideal that is as old as the Republic. What's more, the timing of this ill-advised slime attack against the idea of the common good comes when Americans are reeling from growing economic instability . Banks are failing, wages are stagnant, prices are rising, new foreclosures are reported every day. Do Hoenig and Fox think that the answer to this dire situation is "every man, woman and child for him or her self"? Talk about un-American. For the one network bent on promoting Intelligent Design over Evolution, you sure are keen on Social Darwinism. And this is the same network that would have us believe that it is the sole defender of the sanctity of Christian values and, by God, of the most holy of all holy holidays, Christmas? Puh-LEAZE.

Finally, a political movement that speaks Jonathan Hoenig's language...